Not so Super Woman.

In my p90 adventure, my 5 lb weights have become ridiculously easy to lift. Alright, I think. I’m ready to move up in lbs, then.

So, here I am, thinking I’m Super Woman. I buy 8 lbs weights from Target. Last night was my “Sculpt” day. Uh…why did I only use the 8lb weights during 3 exercises? Yeah. Attempting to lift those babies over my head was definitely not as easy as I thought it was going to be. (Basically, it was almost impossible.) But, I’m bummed, because I feel like 5 isn’t giving me enough challenge, and I can’t lift 8! Boo! I haven’t seen 6 or 7 lb weights…do those exist anywhere? C’mon puny arms, lift heavy!

I also have been thinking about getting a kettle ball. I’ve seen them being used on The Biggest Loser, but I’m not quite sure how to work them into my own workouts. Do I just swing them around? Haha…I haven’t really looked into what they can be used for, but I’m odd and just think they look fun. Just SAYING “kettle ball” is fun. Knowing my clumsy self, I’d probably throw it right through my studio window or something.

I had an odd day yesterday. I was just a bottomless pit. Every meal I had didn’t seem to fulfill me. It was one of those days where I had to go over my calorie intake, just to keep myself fueled. I mean, I ate really healthy, so caloric wise who cares, but UGH. Does anyone else have those days? I did make a mean stir-fry last night though. Tofu, broccoli, mango and pineapple, covered in Trader Joe’s red Curry sauce. Oh heaven on a plate!

Meh. I’ve been at work for an hour now, and have been unproductive this entire time. Slowly letting the caffeine circulate to my brain… Guess I’ll go check some patron’s books out or something…ha.

Have your cake, and eat it too?

Holy lack of blogging an actual update, Batman!

Not having internet is really lame. The only place I have access to it, rather than my cell phone is work. And, well, I should be WORKING while at work, so I don't have time to update…except, I’m finding myself writing this update at work, so hmmm. There goes that theory!

So, heres what I wanted to update about this time:

I’m still doing p90. Almost at day 60, and I’m finally seeing results. This may be because I totally, TOTALLY fucked myself over and lost all self control and ate/splurged/binged big time on my cruise last month. Ugh. It still makes me sick thinking about it, even though I’ve worked off most of the weight I put on. I hate to even think about it. Its like, did I really work my ass off for 6 months just to seriously gain half of it back? Yeah, HALF. When I got home my scale said 132. 132! I was down to 123! How in the hell did I let myself DO that? Disgusting. Thankfully, the scale has been flirting with the 125 mark, so I’m almost there. I will be back to 123. I am determined. (Hey, I gotta look good for Jillian in October, right?! ;)

So, what happened to my view about "cheat days" that I talked about in a previous post? Hell, cheat days are great. yeah. But a cheat WEEK? A I-lost-track-of-how-many-pieces-of-cake-I-ate week? No bueno.

I take this as a learning experience. I know I can have my cake, yes, but I can't have an ENTIRE cake and expect the scale to stay down. I've even become less strict with myself since I've gotten back, and don't count calories as closely as I did before. I eat healthy, and the weight is coming off. I'm finding a healthy balance. It feels good.

Is it October, yet?

GUESS WHERE I'M GOING IN OCTOBER?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

Five words:
JILLIAN. MICHAELS. ULTIMATE. WELLNESS. CRUISE.


That's right, bloggity blog world. My girl crush. My fitness role model. My weight loss inspiration. AND I get to take a photo with her onboard. Oh, and did I mention that I also get to go to Great Stirrup Cay & Nassau, in The Bahamas? SCORE.

*squeeeel*

Oh, and yes. I am aware this will be my third cruise in 2010. Ha. Ooops?

AHHHHHHHHHH.

www.jillianmichaels.com/cruise

I'd give my right leg to go on this.
MUST.
FIND.
A.
WAY.
ONBOARD.

I weigh 123 pounds.

ONE HUNDRED, TWENTY THREE.

Do you know what this means?

I've officially lost 20 pounds.

Criticism.

Criticism.

How do you deal with it?

It seems that this week was full of, "Geez, how much weight ARE YOU going to lose?" and "Are you trying to disappear off the planet?" and "Go eat a sandwich" and other comments suggesting I am too thin, or not loosing weight in a healthy way.

Lets get this straight. I'm not TRYING to "lose weight". I'm not ON a "diet".

THIS IS A LIFESTYLE, PEOPLE.

Yes, I watch what I eat. This is my choice. Don't get on my case if I prefer not to eat chocolate cake anymore. (Hell. I ate Dove chocolate today, in fact. I'm not starving myself!)

Yes, I workout 6 days a week. This is for my health. And as I tone up, of course I'm getting smaller and gradually weighing less.

I just don't understand why other people don't understand me. Is it a sin that all of a sudden I want to do something good for myself?

I guess you're going to get the good comments, along with the negative ones.

Or, perhaps, do I just smell jealousy? ;) How about YOU go eat a sandwich and shut your face?